Album Covers: The Not-So-Good, The Bad and the Ugly




Not even the Beatles could get away with this one...

Even the biggest entertainment act of the 20th century had to back back when Capitol Records nixed their butchered babies album cover.

The Suits were a little queasy about the concept. And the subdued expressions of the group on the album cover, as released, seem to suggest that they weren't all that happy about the more conservative approach.


Sweet Mother of God!!!


We're thinking if you threw Edgar Winter, Elvis Costello and Rosa Klebb in a blender this is pretty much what you'd get.

Heino is some kind of German folksinger who may explain why so many people in Germany are ga-ga over David Hasslelhoff.

Liebe Mutter translates into Dear Mother, just in case you were wondering.





Not exactly Peter, Paul and Mary ...



We're not sure which one of this trio is Maddy.

And we're also not sure that an accordion and an organ offer the most diverse musical accompaniment, but there it is.

To be fair here, it looks as if this album cover was created from a candid snapshot and not the result of an elaborate photo session.

That said, the cover does have a disturbing funereal vibe to it.

Will Ferrell channelled music groups like this one on SNL.



We couldn't find any recordings of Maddy and the Boys but we imagine they sound something like this.




And speaking of Jesus Use Me...



The Faith Tones



We weren't completely sure whether this is a bona fide album cover or not.

It has such a strange, twisted thing going on here that it might have been some kind of spoof.

There's something about the nuclear mushroom cloud of a hairdo of the Faith Tone on the left and the thousand yard stare of the Faith Tone on the right that seem odd.

And the lighting on the faces is just wrong somehow.

"Use me for what exactly?" is the question that comes to mind.



American Gothic Meets Children of the Corn




Good God! Who the hell's hand is that on her shoulder!!!

It ain't the guy behind her. It's too low for him, too far away for the guy stage right and wrong hand for the guy stage left.



Mike??!!



The most disturbing thing about this cover is that it's for Mike Terry not Michelle Terry.

Are you sure Elton John started out like this?



Somebody call 911



We're pretty sure that whatever is going on here is illegal in at least 42 states, though not necessarily in the one where this album was released....



Again, somebody call 911



This may be some kind of comedy album. A very vulgar one, we would imagine.

First of all, Old Jacinto should lose the hat. A hat like that is always a bad choice.

If Thomas Edison had worn a hat like that we'd still be reading by gaslight.

Imagine Neil Armstrong making his small step on the lunar surface wearing that hat.

Imagine JFK asking us not what our country could do for us, but what we could do for our country wearing that hat.

But, of course, that's not the only thing wrong with the album cover. This peeping tom and his slavering ebullient grin is never going to impress the ladies. No way.

Especially wearing that hat.



Not exactly the Sopranos...



Don't these guys look like they're high-tailing it from some low-rent drive-by in South Jersey?

At least, that's what we hope they're doing.


But seriously, who-the-hell's hand is that???!!!





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